Damn You Economy, Straighten Up!

I hate to be a downer this week, and I know everyone is talking about this, but this has really been on my mind lately.

When we first got engaged economic times were beginning to look a little bad. Things weren't going great and we heard the beginning grumblings of foreclosures and bad loans, but we thought we were in for a little recession.

Now it feels like things are going to get really bad, and it makes me think maybe we shouldn't be blowing all this money on a wedding. I feel like my job is fairly safe and stable, our organization has been growing for a while, but now all this talk of people losing jobs has me worried too.

In turn I find myself spending virtually no money on unnecessary things. We eat out once a week, tops (this is LA, and given how much we used to eat out, this is a big change).

So far our plans are pretty much staying the same. The only thing I am thinking of changing is that since we haven't booked a videographer we might not just get one. I wasn't too keen on the idea to begin with and the one's I love are going to set us back more money than I want to spend right now.

Anyone else changing their habits or plans out of fear? (I hate acting out of fear, but right now it really is the most prudent thing).

Yes on Prop 8 Campaign Airs first Ad

The people at Protect Marriage started airing the first ad urging people to vote yes on 8.

This is so utterly depressing. I wish this wasn't so disheartening and frightening, but it is, because I know how effective these fear campaigns can be.

The ideas set forth that "activist" judges somehow undid the will of the people is ridiculous. The real irony is that the Chief Justice of the California Supreme Court is very conservative and was appointed by Ronald Reagan, and he was part of the majority.

Using people's kids to frighten them is just low and stupid. I can't remember ever being forced to learn about marriage when I was in school. And the idea that people will be sued for their personal beliefs is ridiculous.

A doctor who refuses to perform abortions for ethical reasons cannot be sued for not performing an abortion, because he doesn't do them at all. A doctor who performs artificial insemination on a regular basis for women but refuses to do it for a lesbian can be sued for discrimination because he refuses to perform a procedure that he does normally do for other people (and he was sued, and he lost, and it was right that he did).

I know this is going to frighten a lot of people, and I post it because I think it's so important for fair-minded people to know the arguments that are being used, recognize them as lies and fear-mongering, and go out and spread the truth.

Sometimes I wish this was all less political and more strictly wedding related, but the fact is that gay weddings are political. Whenever I walk down the street holding hands with my partner, that's a political statement, and it will continue to be a political statement until the day we don't have to fight for equal rights and protection under the law.

Friday Weigh-In #3

Super good news this week!

I lost 2 lbs despite the fact that I've been home sick for the past 3 days and only went to the gym once. I caught this dang cold from someone at work and I've been miserable for three days now. Hopefully I will be better soon.

I am also proud of myself for staying away from the Costco cookies my uncle brought home this week. I have not a single one, even though the double nut look so delicious. I'm looking forward to a cheat meal at Clearman's North Woods Inn this weekend. If you live in So Cal and have never had their cheesy toast or ranch dressing, you have not lived!

Flowers by Asiel Designs

I figured I would take some time to write about some of the florists we are considering for our ceremony for anyone that my be in the LA area. Asiel came highly recommended by our photographer, Daniell Biel at SkyeBlu Photography.

I really enjoyed looking at their website. I especially love their "Tim Burton Inspired" section. When I think of what I want our wedding to look like I think of Burton's distinctive look with sharp lines, swirls, and colors that are bold and strong.

I have a meeting scheduled next week to discuss some ideas with their floral designer, so I'm totally excited to see what they come up with. More details to follow!

Spielberg Makes Like Brad

Mr. Steven Spielberg wants to be like Brad (don't we all?) and is contributing $100,000 to defeat prop 8 in California. Mr. Spielberg, I am so sorry I haven't watched one of your movies in years, but I still love E.T. Besides you and Brad can easily afford it right? Hey, you guys wanna buy me some wedding flowers?

Off-Topic Post and Movie Review

I know it's not at all related to anything wedding-like, but I'm home sick and bored and I'll blog if I want to. So I just watched this movie called Eagle vs. Shark and I just don't get what the attraction is. I mean when all was said and done it was a cute-ish movie with some sort of love the one you're with message, ,but what is up with these characters?

It started with Napoleon Dynamite I think. I may be the only soon to be 30 year old that did not think that was the least bit funny. I mean are all the main characters supposed to be mentally challenged? Doesn't that make it politically incorrect to laugh at them?

So in Eagle vs. Shark these two characters who may have stepped out of Napoleon Dynamite fall in love, and it's all supposed to be very indie with weird clothes, and look all our music is acoustic again and it doesn't even need to be sung in a consistent key.

That was my rant for the day. Sorry for the negative tone. I think this congestion and cabin fever are doing bad things to my attitude.

Still the Debate about the Flowers and the Video

In my mind at least it's a debate. These are the last two big things that we have to decide. At first I was sure I didn't want video, and then I saw videos from Paper Tape Films and fell in love with those. The only problem is that since we are getting married on a holiday weekend they have a six hour minimum and that would set us back about $4.5k.

Then I ran across Layer Cake Films and they also do gorgeous 8 mm wedding video. Unfortunately their holiday weekend minimum is $3.5k. Why does everything in LA have to cost so much?

Then there's the flower front. For a while I was seriously considering doing these ourselves, but started thinking about the logistics. Orange County isn't way far from home, but it is a 40 minute drive. If we had flowers delivered they would need to arrive on Friday for a Sunday wedding, or we could pick them up at the Downtown LA flower mart. Either way that means transporting those to the OC, and I have already had a few experiences with flowers not travelling so well, so I'm a little worried about how that may turn out.

So It's back to the drawing board. In the next few weeks we will probably meet with the lovely people at Asiel's Designs, and the work on their website is gorgeous. I feel like they really have a great eye for whimsical, which is totally what we want.

I've also spoken to Bobbe over at Bobbe Vagell Floaral Designs and he seems like a really nice guy. His work is amazing as well.

So only time will tell what may happen. I feel like so much of the wedding is set and these are the two areas where we can fiddle with the budget. If we ended up not having video I would be ok with that too, since we already have a great photographer, and I don't really want to spend money on a "bargain" videographer. I mean if I don't like the final product and never watch it, it's not really a bargain.

No on Prop 8 Launches First Televeision Ad

The No on Prop 8 campaign launched the first ad in what is sure to be a grueling campaign. The ad features an elderly couple talking about their lesbian daughter. Nice looking old people, non-threatening, the sort of people you wish were your grandparents. I guess it doesn't really do it for me, but this sort of stuff must work, right?

The campaign is raising funds to air the ad as much as possible leading up to the election. You can contribute here. Working around lots of media in the LA area I know how important and expensive these campaigns can be, so I'll be making a contribution today (even though it does tick me off to have to contribute money to a campaign to ensure we keep the right to get married when I would rather be spending that money getting married, grrr).

Friday Weigh-In #2

Hooray! Week #2 and I lost 1.2 lbs. Also I am very happy that I am not very sore this week, I'm settling into the new exercise routine, and I'm not hungry all the time anymore.

I'm definitely looking forward to a cheat meal this weekend. I'm thinking a yummy pastrami sandwich or a nice cheeseburger. But why settle for one? Louis Burger in Long Beach will make you a delicious "Colossal Burger" which is a burger with some pastrami meat thrown on top. I know it sounds terrible, but it's so greasily delicious.

Brad Pitt Supports Gay Marriage

From The Associated Press:

LOS ANGELES - Brad Pitt has donated $100,000 to fight California's November ballot initiative that would overturn the state Supreme Court decision legalizing same-sex marriage.


It's the first time voters will be asked to ban same-sex marriage in a state where gay couples already have won the right to wed. Same-sex marriage is legal in Massachusetts and California.

It's the first time voters will be asked to decide the issue in either California or Massachusetts — the states where gays have won the right to wed.

"Because no one has the right to deny another their life, even though they disagree with it, because everyone has the right to live the life they so desire if it doesn't harm another and because discrimination has no place in America, my vote will be for equality and against Proposition 8," Pitt said Wednesday.

Trevor Neilson, Pitt's political and philanthropic adviser, told The Associated Press that Pitt was surprised that his colleagues in the entertainment industry had not donated more money to support the battle against Proposition 8.

Earlier in the week, Pitt and Angelina Jolie announced they donated $2 million to help fight HIV/AIDS and tuberculosis in Ethiopia.

I was thinking of watching "Burn After Reading," Now I'll definitely go, thanks Brad!

Gay Weddings From The Knot

A few days ago Meg over at a A Practical Wedding wrote a lists of some of the things she did and did not like about weddings. Under the dislikes she mentioned new Gay Weddings by the Knot.

For those of you unfamiliar the Knot is the Wal-Mart of the online wedding community. Sort of a one-stop shop for anything you may need to know or buy for your wedding (and also like Wal-Mart considered by many to be evil and a symbol of all that is wrong with everything, I have no opinion on that front).

Anyway, Meg's gripe was that the gay knot is it's own independent website, instead of just being introduced as part of the regular knot website, a sort of separate but equal mentality. This aspect of it did not really bother me as much as her.

I think what did bother me is this sort of idea that the wedding industry might just be looking at us as great big walking bags of cash, inconspicuously marked with a giant "$". I feel like there's all these people out there saying, "Let's legalize gay marriage because it's a way for me to make more money."

On the other hand, I know this is America, and if you want to get people to do something you have to relate it to money. Which is why fines are such an efficient way of enforcing the law. If the prospect of being able to make money from me and my brethren is going to encourage you to fight for gay marriage, I feel like we are at a point in the battle where we need all the help we can get and can't really be too choosy about philosophies.

Are there any hockey-moms for gay marriage out there?

What do I like about the site? Being able to see pictures of what other people are doing with their weddings that I can relate to. Hearing stories from people going through some of the problems we're going through. A lot of these issues are faced by all soon to be married couples, but there are some issues particular to gays and lesbians.

For these reasons I don't think it's necessarily terrible for the website to be separate from the main site. I didn't like the knot because I found it to be very unhelpful. There was just too much information and advertising to be able to find the substance I needed.

I am not even in love with the Gay knot. To date the best resource I have found to navigate the madness of this industry are the blogs written by soon to be married people, so much so that they inspired me to do this myself and hopefully help others sort through all the static out there in wedding land.

Balloons at a Wedding?

I know balloons are not the first things that come to mind when people say wedding. I think most people think flowers and chiffon draped over everything. Not that I have anything against flowers and chiffon (except for the price of all those flowers).

Now I'm not thinking bunches of balloons like you would see at a kid's birthday party, the idea I really like are really large balloons like in the pictures above.

The ceiling in our venue is very high, and I'm thinking it would look really cool to walk in and see these large orbs floating about at different levels. Now I just have to find someone that does these in LA.

Random Thought for the Day

In California: Now all the good ones will be gay and married.

Dingbat's Agenda Giveaway

The people at Dingbat's Agenda have come up with a really great way to get me and other people to blog about them. They are having a giveaway for an entire free suite of invitations, and to enter all you have to do is blog about the giveaway. The invitations look great and would totally work with our madhatter theme, I can see flowers or lanterns working out really great, so here's to hoping I win!

Friday Weigh-In #1

First week and we are off to a fairly decent start, I lost 1 lb in 5 days. If I can lose a pound or two a week for the next few moths I'll be thrilled, and besides they say the weight you lose slowly is the weight that's most likely to stay off.

No On Prop 8 Rolls Out Merchandise

The No On Prop 8 Campaign has rolled out some merchandise so you can show the world you're against inequality. It seems like a really great idea, but if you're going to try to get the gays to wear these t-shirts, maybe they should have been a little more stylish? Maybe I'll get a button or a mug . . .

A Lesbian Wedding From SkyeBlu

I am so excited to see that Danielle over at SkyeBlu (who we have booked to be our wedding photographer) has posted pictures of a lesbian wedding on her blog. As usual she has done an amazing job, and every time she updates her blog it only makes me more excited for our own wedding.

Getting Hot Hurts

It's been a few days and for that I apologize, there have been many goings-on this week. The most important of which is that I have decided to get myself in (good) shape (because while round might be a shape, it's not the shape I want to be).

I know I shouldn't necessarily focus on looking good for one day in my life , and should strive to be healthy all the time. The truth is I was was a chubby kid, who grew into a chubby college student that finally decided to do something about it.

The past few years have been a big up and down thing with the weight, but I'm hoping this time the good habits stick! As a bonus, come wedding day I want people who haven't seen me in a while to say, "wow, he looks good."

As I am typing this my fingertips are probably the only parts of my body that aren't sore. My quads are killing me. But in the end it will all pay off. I usually go through short periods of time when I fall off the exercise wagon, and I get right back on, and the first week is always painful.

I will keep the readership abreast of my weekly weigh-ins, and though I know I probably won't look like the picture above, I know I will look damn good on my wedding day because I'll be wearing a whole lot of happy.

Let's Talk Wedding Rings

I am not a big jewelry wearer, and I am definitely not a fan of yellow gold, so when I got a white gold engagement ring with two little diamonds and a brushed finish I completely fell in love with it.

Now that I've gotten a taste of sparkles I want more, so I think I want my wedding ring to look something like this.


I know it's not traditional, but then again neither am I. I went to go look at something similar at Tiffany's but the band was too thin and the price was too high (ya, I know, Tiffany's). Also the Tiffany ring is platinum, and I have no problem whatsoever wearing white gold to save $1,000.

I found this ring on-line, but the store I found it through is well rated and the seller is in the Downtown Los Angeles jewelry district, so hopefully some day soon I can go and pay a visit during my lunch hour and see if I like the ring in person.

Prop 8 Is Cool!

The Scene: Two teenagers meet in a high school hallway and high five.

Dude 1: Dude, what's up?
Dude 2: Not much dude how you doin'?
Dude 1: You know what I worry about?
Dude 2: Global Warming? The growing national deficit? Falling test scores in the inner-city? Terrorists?
Dude 1: No, I worry that allowing homosexuals to get married will diminish the value of any future marriage I might have.
Dude 2: That is pretty scary, what can we do?
Dude 1: We can log on to iProtectMarriage.com and join all the really cool kids that are out there fighting prop 8. The website is totally cool, it's designed to speak to me and it totally gets me. You can tell it's cool because they put the lowercase "i" at the front, like in iPod.
Dude 2: I will so totally have to log on and check it out, seeming as I am a teenager and totally concerned about this sort of thing.

I Love Commercials

I came across this other great ad for no on prop 8 with a lot of really great people speaking out against the constitutional amendment. So maybe Sarah Palin isn't on my side, but celebrities are! And ultimately, who do we value more in our society?

A Great Alteranitve to Favors

A few years ago we attended a friend's wedding and the thing that stuck out as the most fun in my mind was her photobooth. When we got engaged the first thing I thought of was having one at our wedding.

I remember how much fun we had taking pictures with the bride, stuffing friends in there, and being just all around goofy. The best part is the photobooth prints out two sets of pictures, so your guests get to take one with them, and with the second set they make a really great scrapbook/ guestbook that will make for a great keepsake.

We decided to go with Cheesy Photo Booths since their prices were so much more reasonable than the other companies we looked at. They also allowed us to check out their set-up at a wedding they were going to be at in the area before the guests arrived.

Their package is also very all inclusive, whereas with many of the companies I looked at charged extra for these things. With Cheesy Photo Booths we are getting six hours (though we will probably end up only using four), double prints, a cd with all the pictures taken, and a banner across the bottom of all the pictures taken. Also we will probably bring along a box of props so our guests can get silly, I'm thinking I will probably hit the after Halloween sales this year.